


For Christmas

by darlingkingofhell



Series: the Hotchner Pack [1]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Aaron Hotchner/Reader - Freeform, Aaron hotchner is autistic, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Autistic Aaron Hotchner, Autistic Penelope Garcia, Autistic Reader, Domestic Fluff, Eventual Romance, Gen, Hotch loves garcia and wants to keep her safe and happy at all times, Hurt/Comfort, No Haley, Pack Bonding, Pack Dynamics, Penelope Garcia is autistic, Platonic Relationships, Protective Aaron Hotchner, Slow Burn, ayyyyy, but - Freeform, but I will update the tags as I go, but also fluff, eventual luke/penny, it's my party and I'll do what I want to, no romance yet!, not hotch/penny, platonic Hotch/Garcia, reader is autistic, yes jack
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:29:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28122393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darlingkingofhell/pseuds/darlingkingofhell
Summary: Hotch makes a pack of his own, bringing Penny under his protection. With their bond so strong, there’s sure to be tension when a new agent seems to be Aaron’s mate. A slowburn story of love told through snapshots of Aaron, Jack, and Penny’s family growing to include a new member.Slightly crackAU: A/B/O-verse, starts in 2004 Haley is already dead & Rossi is on the team. Penny is just now joining the team. Dynamics breakdown is:Alphas: JJ, Prentiss, Hotchner, MorganBetas: Reid, (eventually Luke)Omegas: Garcia, Rossi, Readerno significant heat/rut cycles that are debilitating. mpreg is possible but won’t be a significant plot point.
Series: the Hotchner Pack [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2060253
Kudos: 13





	1. December 2004

December 2004,

It was snowy and peaceful in Quantico, VA. Christmas was only a few days away and the team was tense, hoping for a quiet, case-free Christmas. Hotch wasn’t as hopeful as his teammates, but he kept it to himself.

The day before Christmas Eve the team got…well, not quite a case. More like a possible problem…..or solution. Thankfully it could be handled in Quantico, and Hotch was sent in first to interrogate Penelope Garcia, a.k.a. the Black Queen, a.k.a. a pain in SSA Hotchner’s side. When they’d first raided her nest, she’d put up a fuss about their muddy boots dirtying up her blankets and carpet. When they’d cuffed her she complained about a chipped nail. And now she was putting up a fight about it smelling like “wet dog in this craphole.” Hotch might have sympathized with her if she hadn’t been inconveniencing his life in particular. Jack was expecting him home for the holidays and he hated feeling like a constant disappointment.

She was currently fussing about in the cold-grey interrogation room. He could practically smell the waves of distress from the other side of the door. He braced himself for the angry omega’s onslaught before entering. “Ms. Garcia,” he started, low voice leaving no guess as to who was in charge, “you’ve been read your rights?” The omega stood, slamming her palms on the table, clearly distressed and clearly trying to puff herself up bigger than she was “FUDGE–I MEAN *ah* f-FUCK DA POLICE!!” She shouted, baring her teeth at the alpha. _So this is how it’s gonna go then_. Hotch thought to himself. “Ms. Garcia, we have enough to put you in for life.” Hotch continued in his quietly dominating tone, not playing into her distress at all. Garcia sat back down, trying to hide the micro-expressions that gave away the fear those words put in her. “So?” she pouted petulantly. Hotch knew the three words that would get her to crack: “No computer privileges.” He told her seriously. All it took was a moment for his words to sink in before she was bawling, pleading with him about how she wasn’t tough enough to go to prison. “Or,” Hotch lightened his tone “there’s another option… you join us.” He let a contract thud in front of her, setting a pen next to it. She pouted at the contract as though just by glaring at it she could magically poof her way out of this mess.

“Why would I want to work with you, Suit?” she spat out, still trying to play up how tough she was. The alpha chuckled internally, able to smell the jumble of relief and fear rolling of the omega. “Well, for starters, you’ll be helping put bad people behind bars. Actually bad people who are ‘tough enough for prison.’ I’ve read your file, and your work is impressive. I also know you only hack people you believe to be evil. You would be helping the FBI catch very evil people and protect innocent people who need you.” Hotch said, tone soft and low. He didn’t expect it to be so easy to like her, but something about her was just so endearing. She thought it over for a second before blurting out “I want a lawyer.” Hotch’s shoulders sank, thinking _one step forward two back._ “Not for anything bad,” Garcia rushed to assure him “I need a lawyer to look over that contract with me. Don’t think I’m about to sign something without reading it Mr. Suit-And-Tie.” Hotch huffed out a laugh, appreciating her good sense.

The rest of the afternoon was spent arranging a temporary living situation for Garcia while she and her lawyer went over the contract together. By dinner time, she had a list of changes neatly spelled out on pink paper in glittery purple ink and Hotch had secured an FBI apartment halfway between his house and Quantico. While JJ went over the changes with Strauss, the rest of the team was trying to figure out how to handle the first request: “I need a fully furnished apartment with appliances and dishes etc. my ex cannot know that I’m leaving or where I’m going. I’ll also need to go shopping for new clothes.” Hotch was quick to volunteer to take Penelope to IKEA and Prentiss volunteered to take her clothes shopping, but Rossi suggested she might feel more comfortable with another omega, so he decided to tag along. With that settled, and the contract changes agreed to, all that was left to decide was who was taking Penelope to her new home. After a short silence, Hotch cleared his throat and said he could do it, since it was on his way home anyway. Rossi smirked but the rest of the team was too relieved to be dismissed to notice Hotch’s ears turning pink.

The drive to the apartment was tense and quiet at first. Hotch started to say something a couple of times, but everything he had planned sounded stupid in his head. He flapped his hand a little, trying to relieve some of the anxiety he felt, which didn’t go unnoticed by Pen. “I do that too, you know. Stim.” She said in a soft voice. Hotch noticed she was fidgeting with a small textured ball she’d pulled from her bag. He relaxed a little, offering her a small, but genuine smile. “My son, Jack, I don’t think he’s autistic. He’s six now and hasn’t shown any signs of it….My parents missed it, too busy with their own stuff, so I wasn’t diagnosed until a few years ago. But I’ve been looking out for it in him. I’d hate for him to grow up feeling different and not knowing why.” They were silent for a bit longer, but it was a comfortable silence between new friends. “My parents died when I was young, but I’d already gotten diagnosed by then. I think the breaking apart computers gave me away.” Penelope offered with a small smirk. The rest of the drive to Penny’s new home was mostly quiet with a few comments back and forth. Aaron couldn’t help but like Penny just a little bit more each time she would repeat a sign name she found funny. He liked her smell too. A lot of omegas smelled too sweet to him, but Garcia smelled like sweet new wood, sharp young blossoms, and ginger. It was comforting.

Aaron walked Penny up to her apartment, needing to make sure she was safe. The alpha in him whined instantly at seeing how upset she was at the bare, comfortless space. She was trying to hide it, but Aaron could see her hand flapping and the scent of distress taking over her normal sweet smell. Omegas needed a den that felt secure and homey and Hotch was certain that being autistic only amplified that feeling of needing things to feel _right_. Penelope forcibly nodded her head, trying to talk herself into believing she felt okay. She turned to him with her eyes welling up with tears. “Okay thank you, sir, um, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” She said briskly, voice clearly close to cracking. A small tear escaped with a hitch in her breath and that was the last straw. “No. You’re coming home with me,” Aaron asserted, “if..if you want to of course.” He added on, realizing going to a new aquantaince’s home may be even more distressing, but Penelope just exhaled in relief hugging Hotch suddenly “ohmygoshthankyousirOH! Sorry, are you okay with being touched??” She gasped, hopping back a little, eyes wide. Hotch chuckled a little and assured her he was okay with hugs on special occasions.

When they pulled up to the Hotchner residence, Penny noticed how Aaron’s eyes were lighter and his smile was easy. Stepping in the doorway she immediately heard why: “DaaAAAAaddyyy!!!” came an excited shout as a kid came running down the hallway charging into his dad’s open arms. “Hey, bud. How was your day?” Hotch asked with a wide grin. “Goooood! We learned about dinosaurs and fossils and composting and…” Jack began a Reid-worthy recap of his day before stopping short staring up at Penelope. “Jack, meet Penelope. She’s going to be staying with us until her own den is nice and comfy.” Hotch introduced her, but Penelope was already down on her knees and offering a handfor Jack to shake. Jack decided he liked her, told her as much, and hugged his dad around the neck before being sent off to get ready for bed. Hotch led Penelope around, introducing her to Jack’s nanny, Niki, when they looped through the kitchen. “And please, I don’t care if it’s 3a.m., if you’re hungry please eat anything you can find in here.” Aaron told her.

Penelope loved Hotch’s home. It was warm and cozy and perfect and it smelled like Hotch’s pack–a warm mix of woodsmoke, sweetgum, and clove. There was a guest room already made up with a few toys scattered on the floor. “Sorry, I’ve told Jack to pick up his things, but sometimes that just means shuffling them in here, I’ll go get him..” Hotch started before Penelope interrupted with a “No! No, ah, it’s okay. I don’t mind.” Hotch glanced at her, trying to figure out if she was just trying to be a polite guest, but she assuaged his doubt with a quiet “really.” He nodded and left to find some spare pajamas while she got used to the room. It was nice, light blue walls with dark wood floors and white bed dressing. There were some framed drawings on the wall, clearly Jack’s playful scrawl. The pillows smelled lightly of Hotch’s pack, which Garcia expected to feel suffocating, but it was comforting. There was a rag rug on the floor which gave her happy shivers up her spine. Penelope felt safe and happy for the first time in so long she couldn’t remember. Who knows what her future will be like, so she just tried to enjoy the comfort while she could and shove aside the growing pain in her chest of not having anyone to call pack anymore.

Hotch returned with a spare toothbrush, toothpaste, soap, an old t-shirt and a pair of pajamas, which Garcia was surprised to find were actually in her size. He also had an armful of blankets, awkwardly explaining that he knew omegas liked nesting and he wanted her to feel comfortable and…yeah. anyway. He also let her know that Prentiss and Rossi would be taking her clothes shopping tomorrow, since she would probably be needing clothes first. She would be staying with Hotch and Jack until they could get her den feeling like home. Wishing her goodnight, Aaron left Penelope to settle in for the night, reminding her to treat the house as a home. Penny sat on the bed, breathing for a moment, gathering the clothes and toiletries before ducking into the bathroom and turning the water to steaming hot. She took her time scrubbing her skin of the overwhelming smells of all the people (mostly pushy alphas) who had been handling her all day. When she left the bathroom clothed in soft clothes, she felt somewhat less gross. She now smelled a bit like Hotch and Jack, which made her smile a little before a bitter pang stabbed at her belly. She lay down in bed, burying herself under layers of blankets and let herself cry, and cry, and cry, hating how the pain of loneliness followed her even into this place that should have felt like a break from the pain. But it only made it worse. She was invading this happy pack’s home, just an unwanted stray with no family, no mate, no pack of any kind. And it hurt. But Penny had built herself up before and she could do it again. This was a new start. She could be whoever she wanted to be and no one would be holding her back.


	2. Dec 24, 2004

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's Christmas Eve!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The comic has a snippet referring to Garcia as “kid,” this is because it’s Rossi speaking and everyone is his kiddo, not because she is autistic. Please don’t infantilize autistic ppl. There’s a moment referring to Garcia as “fat” this is a factual descriptor coming from a self-identifying fat author, if you prefer the term plus-size, just sub that in. I personally think “plus-size” is a way of continuing to make fat a bad thing, rather than a neutral descriptor. 
> 
> Also re: Hotch’s scent, sweetgum is a type of tree that smells really good. It doesn’t refer to bubblegum ( but hey, read it how you want to ).
> 
> ____________________________________
> 
> Comic Text:
> 
> reid: what’s she like?
> 
> Rossi: Well, kiddo, i wasn’t quite sure what to expect... | ...things got off to a bad start. 
> 
> Penelope (in flashback in a dressing room): NO
> 
> Rossi (cont.): everything was too scratchy | strangling her | just wrong. | it didn’t take a profiler to see the kid was overwhelmed...until we found... | SAFE CLOTHES! | 
> 
> (small boxes, each containing a heart + (i.e. a video game)): NO TAGS! | COLOR!! | SOFT!!!
> 
> Rossi (cont.): we bought two in every color

December, 24, 2004

It was Christmas Eve and things were not okay. Penny was pacing back and forth in the guest bedroom, trying to relieve some of the overwhelming anxiety coursing through her by flapping her arms and walking with a rock in her step but that could only do so much.Her brain was cycling through a constant list of anxieties once she’d realized it was Christmas Eve and _oh no, that meant she was taking up Prentiss and Rossi’s time on Christmas Eve and Hotch and Jack’s Christmas, and they probably didn’t even like her because she was a criminal and they’ve had to hunt her down rather than spending their holidays with their packs and it was Christmas Eve and who wanted to take care of some unbounded, packless, criminal omega they didn’t even know on Christmas Eve_ …. She’d been doing this since she woke up and Hotch was on edge because he’s been sitting in the hallway listening to her pace for the last half hour.

His hands were balled into fists trying to keep himself from going and comforting the distressed omega. He didn’t understand what had her so worked up and he was too afraid to ask in case it would somehow make her even more uncomfortable. All he wanted was to help her feel safe and taken care and _maybe it was a mistake taking her here, maybe she would be more comfortable with someone else.._ Hotch was texting Rossi with a bunch of word vomit about the situation, to which to old Italian was nothing but reassuring. Rossi let him know that he and Prentiss would be over in 30 with coffee and muffins for their new family member. Hotch made himself wait another five minutes before getting up and knocking on Penelope’s door. The pacing stopped, there was a pause, and then the door cracked open showing a sliver of a very rumpled Garcia. Hotch’s nose wanted to wrinkle at the waves of anxiety souring Garcia’s normal smell. “Uh, hi. Good morning. Sorry to bother you but Rossi and Prentiss will be here in about 20 minutes.” Hotch told her, pausing for a bit, feeling himself grow tense with how upset she looked. “Are…are you okay? I know you don’t know me that well, but I hope if there’s anything I can do to help you feel more comfortable you’ll tell me.”Hotch made himself check her eyes to see if there were any signs that his words had helped, but instead he found her eyes welling with tears.

Without thinking Hotch pulled her into a firm hug, holding the back of her neck with one hand and his other arm wrapped around her shoulders. Penny was shocked for a moment before full-on bawling. She pushed out of Hotch’s arms and started pacing harder. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have–“ Hotch started before Pen cut him off. “No, no, thank you, really…I just when I feel like this I can’t stand still, I need to _move_.” Hotch understood, not leaving the doorway, unsure what to do. Unsure of what else to do, Aaron played with his fingers and asked the only thing he could think of: “why are you upset?” Penny added some arm hand shaking to her pace before piecing together her thoughts.

“It’s Christmas Eve…..it’s Christmas Eve and you don’t know me and I don’t know you, only difference is you have a family and a pack and I don’t…not–that came out wrong…it’s good you have a pack, it’s good, and it’s okay I don’t…I mean, it’s not, but it is…for now..I’ll be fine….anyway…crap what was I sayin-OH! right, I’m intruding. I’m ruining your holiday and I’m ruining Rossi and Pretiss’s Christmas Eve and I hate it. I hate being a burden…I should just go, I’m gonna go. Yep, yeah, going. Don’t worry about my clothes or the apartment, I’ll figure it out. It’s okay….yeah, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to ruin anyone’s Christmas..” Hotch waited another thirty seconds before deciding she was finished.

“For someone smart enough to hack PETA, you’re not very bright.” Hotch said lightly, holding up a hand to stop her retort “What I mean is….if I didn’t want you in my home, you wouldn’t be in my home. If Rossi and Emily didn’t want to take you shopping for clothes, they wouldn’t have volunteered. Emily lives alone with her cat, no living family, and Rossi’s about the same. Now, we will be joining them for our annual Christmas party, but otherwise they have their own holiday plans that they decided weren’t as fun as getting to know you. You are a part of this team now, and while it may not be pack in the traditional sense, it is family––if you want it. So, please, don’t leave. I….want you here. I promise I’m not just saying that.” Just then a husky Italian throat cleared from behind Aaron. Rossi was standing in the hall with a tray of coffee cups and a bag that smelled like bananas and heaven.

“if you two are done with early morning confessions, I’m starving.” Dave said with a smirk. “Don’t let him fool you he already at a scone and two muffins on the way over!” came Emily’s shout from the kitchen. Rossi shrugged. That broke the tension, pulling a relieved laugh from Penny and a chuckle from Aaron. Breakfast was warm and comforting, and gave Garcia a chance to see a few of her team members in a setting that wasn’t an awful holding cell of awfulness that smelled like too many alphas in a simultaneous wizzing contest. This was way better than that. Rossi even called Garcia kiddo and the whole team very graciously started chatting about one of Jack’s paintings until her tears went back into hiding. When It was time to go, Penny impulsively hugged Hotch goodbye, not noticing Rossi’s eyebrow raise or Emily’s smirk at the taller alpha.

Penny, having nothing else to occupy herself, had spent a few hours last night researching clothing stores before she settled on one that looked the most promising. Having a bit of fat was great until you had to explain to a certain clothing store that a size 12 was not, in fact, the biggest size people came in. She was feeling optimistic about finding some clothes she would like! But then the first shirt was too tight and felt like a straightjacket, then the jacket was scratchy and the tags were all wrong, the skirt smelled funny and the blouse’s fabric was the _Wrong Texture_. Soon Penny was surrounded by way too many clothes and none of them were right. She was so close to just telling Rossi to go home and beg Emily to call Hotch, or maybe she should have Rossi call Hotch…wait why did she want Hotch?? Anyway. She was overwhelmed, uncomfortable, and was feeling tears clawing at her throat. First she was wasting their Christmas Eve, but now she couldn’t find clothes that didn’t feel like her skin was crawling.

Salvation came in the form of Rossi, who had up until now let Emily make most of the suggestions. He kindly suggested that maybe the alpha wasn’t “getting it.” and that an omega might just be better at telling which clothes were softest. Like a Fairy Grandpa, Rossi arrived with The Outfit: a brightly printed cardigan ( no tags ) and a dress that had a soft inner lining. Penelope was in love. She contemplated proposing marriage, but decided instead on promising him some dinner when she had her den settled. He sweetened the deal when he told her the same clothes came in several different prints and colors, and any they didn’t have in her size they would order. Penny felt lighter leaving the store with an armload of clothes that fit (and even pajamas with cute little cats printed all over!) She could pretend just for the day that things were normal, and maybe it would soon be true.

When she got home–back to Hotch’s** it was almost evening. Jack and Aaron were sitting in the living room watching a Christmas movie marathon. Penelope didn’t want to intrude so she quickly ducked into her–the guest room** with her new clothes. As she was hanging up some clothes in the closet and folding the rest, there was a soft knock at the door. “come in,” Garcia called out. Standing in the doorway was Aaron, watching her put things away with a soft smile. “Frosty’s on next, pajamas are mandatory, I’m afraid.” He said, faux-sternly before disappearing back into the living room. Penny couldn’t wipe the smile off her face. The rest of the day was spent in proper Christmas Eve fashion: lazily watching movies, drinking cocoa (or in Aaron’s case, tea), and shooing Jack off to bed with a warning that Santa would pass up the house if he was still awake.

Penny and Aaron stayed up half-watching the current holiday classic. Then Penny noticed the mantle. At first glance she’d assumed the third stocking was Niki’s or maybe a decorative one, until she noticed the initials. The first had a blue “J” on it, the second a white “A”…. and the third had a pink “P.” Penelope couldn’t stop the tears filling her eyes, or the hitch in her breath, or the awful-yet-wonderful burning in her chest. Aaron noticed but didn’t say anything, not wanting to stress her out. They watched the rest of the movie in comfortable silence. Hotch stretched and rumbled about getting some sleep before automatically leaning over to kiss Penelope on the forehead and heading to his room. He paused in the doorway when he realized what he’d done, but decided to just keep going. Penny was smiling when the tears finally started rolling down her cheeks.

She fell asleep that night silently wishing that if Santa was out there he might bring her something she could call home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi hello thank u for reading and come say hi on tumblr @PiNKESTHONEY <3


	3. Christmas '04

**Dec 25, 2004**

Penny wasn’t crying. She wasn’t. At all. I mean okay sure, maybe everything looked blurry, and her face was wet, and her breath was hitched, but that didn’t mean anything. Maybe she had pink eye, you don’t know…. Okay so maybe, ( m a y b e, ) she was crying, but that’s none of your business, ‘cause Penny has a journal now and it’s getting all her juiciest secrets. It’s also none of your business whether or not she’s taped Aaron and Jack’s Christmas card to the inside of her journal. All you need to know is that Penny is scribbling furiously and happily, Christmas movie still playing, and Aaron may have been smiling quite widely, holding a sleeping Jack in his lap.

**(earlier that day)**

Penny was going to wear a hole in the carpet. _When Aaron said “we” are going to Rossi’s for the annual Christmas party, did he mean “we”, him and Jack, or “we”, him Penny and Jack?? she didn’t want to ask at the time and now it’s been too long for Normal People to ask and should she get dressed like she was going, but what if she wasn’t invited and then Aaron would have to awkwardly explain to her that she wasn’t invited or worse he would just not say anything and bring her along to a party she wasn’t even wanted at or invited to? and what if_ _––_ –a knock at the door broke her out of her spiraling.

Aaron was standing with Jack on his hip, both in soft, space-themed pajamas. Hotch had a Santa hat over his soft black hair. Their pack scent smelled like a soft autumn morning, crisp air muting the spicier notes in their normal scent. Penelope felt herself noticeably relaxing just from Aaron’s mere presence. “hi, ah Merry Christmas!” Penelope squeaked. Arron smiled softly, murmuring “Merry Christmas” and Jack shouting out “MArrY ChISmAsSs!!” before Hotch remembered why he’d knocked. “oh! we’re heading to Rossi’s around noon, you don’t have to change, we always show up in pajamas anyway. Oh and if you want to leave early just use ‘brussels sprouts’ in a sentence. That’s Jack’s and my codeword for when things get overwhelming, so he’ll know what it means too…(jack nodded seriously)… we were just about to make pancakes by the way. If you want chocolate chips you better hurry before Jack’s eaten them all.” With that he walked back to the kitchen as Jack loudly denied eating _ALL_ the chocolate chips ( “only _most_ the chocolate chibs daddy! !” )

Penny chuckled and soon followed the sound of laughter and oldies Christmas music. Jack was sitting on the counter, legs swinging haphazardly to the music while Aaron stirred pancake batter. He bent over holding the bowl low enough for jack to pour a mountain of chocolate chips, shrieking with glee. Penny lingered in the doorway for a minute, just watching the two boys singing along to Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, both shouting out the extra lines of “light a lightbulb!” “hey Pinocchio!” and “like Monopoly!” When Aaron glanced up at Penelope, he blushed all the way to the tips of his ears but kept singing along with Jack. Soon the smell of chocolatey deliciousness was filling the kitchen and Penny was singing along with the boys.

Jack would be opening presents at Rossi’s but there were still stockings to open! Hotch had filled both Jack’s and Penny’s with candy and small treats, but was surprised to find gifts in his own. Penny had asked Rossi to make an extra stop yesterday, getting what Rossi assured her were Aaron’s favorite snacks: chex mix, Brach’s gummy worms, and cheddar cheese quaker rice chips ( for the texture ). She also found a small stuffed squirrel wearing a tie that reminded her of him and a pair of black socks with smiling worms instead on pinstripes. She was positive he would hate them, but he immediately put them on, smiling as enthusiastically as Jack ( whose mouth was currently stuffed full of chocolate ). Penny hadn’t expected to get anything either and was giddily putting the bright pink butterfly clips in her hair and digging into some of the jelly beans, trying to extricate the nasty flavors so she could eat them in peace. Penny felt her heart breaking and settling at the same time, feeling so full of _home_.

**( noon-ish )**

Penny felt butterflies rioting in her stomach as they stood on Rossi’s porch waiting for him to answer the door. _What if she wasn’t actually invited, what if they didn’t want her there. Would it be awkward? should she have brought her stim ball, no that would have been awkward..would it?_ she didn’t even realize she had been flapping her arm and rocking a little until she felt Aaron’s spare hand lightly on her back. “you okay?” he asked when she looked up. She thought for a moment before nodding her head. He smiled and she couldn’t help but smile back. And that’s when Rossi opened the door.

He greeted them enthusiastically and ushered them inside, out of the freezing weather. Rossi’s living room was warmly lit, decorated with Christmas lights and a tree with fluffy cotton garland. Most of the team was already there, they were just missing Reid. Everyone was very nice, introducing themselves to Penelope and saying how they were excited to have her on the team. Penny couldn’t tell if most of them were just doing the Normal Person thing of being nice regardless of whether they meant it or not, but she felt like Rossi was for real when he promised her she’d be getting an invitation over for dinner ( a.k.a. a cooking lesson ) soon. Penny thought he might be relieved to finally have another omega on the team. The team’s scent was interesting too. Even though they weren’t a bonded pack, their scents all blended together into something both natural and sharp like spices and forests.

Before too long, Reid showed up, half-soaked with melting snow. Emily pretended to make a fuss about him getting snow on her, but her words didn’t carry much weight seeing as how she was also pulling him in to rest against her side with an arm slung around his shoulder. The team was all relaxed, grateful to be celebrating on actual Christmas. Presents were being passed around happily. Jack was yelling about his new toy police car, Morgan was laughing about JJ’s gift to him ( steel toe boots with “sorry, door” embroidered on the tongue ), and Aaron and Rossi were smiling like proud parents. Penny didn’t expect to feel immediately at home in a room full of strangers, so she surprised herself when she sassed Morgan, earning a laugh from the others.

She also didn’t expect to get any presents. I mean, after all, she’d only showed up two days ago. So when Jack tapped on her shoulder she found it hard not to cry seeing him holding a box with a big red bow and her name spelled in his adorable 6-year-old scrawl with a little heart. “Daddy helped me pick them out!” Jack told her proudly. She glanced up at Aaron. His smile was gentle and that _really_ almost made Penny cry. She carefully pulled the bow off and undid the wrapping paper. Inside was a journal, a new box of pink pencils, and a book of stickers ( with one heart sticker missing ). She pulled Jack into a tight hug telling him it was perfect, which made the boy giggle happily. She gave Hotch a quiet thank you, which was almost inaudible with Spencer shouting out gleefully about his new Doctor Who scarf. No one noticed Rossi capturing a photo of Jack, Penny, and Hotch talking happily. Well, no one but Emily.

The party went on for most of the day, the whole team huddling around the kitchen’s island to “help” cook dinner ( read: steal bits of food while Rossi tried to counter their thievery with slaps from a wooden spoon. Penelope was the only one allowed to officially taste-test ). When the Hotchners and Penny bundled up and made their way out to the car, the sky was a dark blue and snow was falling in heavy sheet. Jack hooted happily, wriggling out of his dad’s arms do dance around, catching snowflakes on his tongue. Hotch chuckled but Penny was already joining Jack, spinning around enjoying the sharp cold kisses on her cheeks. She and Jack bumped into each other, falling down on their butts giggling at one another. Hotch was there with a hand held out to both of them, pulling them up out of the cold snow. Penny overshot a little and ended up stumbling into Hotch, bringing all three of them down into another pile of giggles.

When all three of them had managed to get home, they house was blissfully warm, thawing Penny out. She decided to join Hotch in the living room. She was sitting on the floor with her back against the couch, about to open her journal, when Jack padded in and plopped down on his dad’s lap before quickly falling asleep. Penny and Aaron sifted through holiday movies before deciding on Penny’s favorite, Nightmare Before Christmas. Penny opened her journal, ready to write her first entry, when a card fell out. On the front was a cat wearing a Santa hat, tangled up in yarn that spelled out “Merry Christmas” in looping red letters. Inside the card, Jack had drawn a picture of himself, Hotch, and Penny smiling. On the other side Aaron had written “So you’ll always have someone to talk to, Merry Christmas, Aaron & Jack.” What finally made Penelope crack was the small pink heart sticker below Aaron’s name. When she’d seen a sticker missing from the sheet, she’d just assumed Jack had gotten excited about them and put one on his wall or something. But no, it was right here.

Aaron didn’t mention her tears, but she found his leg next to her side and found herself leaning against him. That may or may not have been how Niki found the three of them next morning, still deep asleep. And she may or may not have snapped a photo. Who knows?


	4. February 2005

February 2005

“Tyson’s such an idiot, why would you trust Russell?? He’s a villain! They’re all villains!! He deserved to be voted off.” Penelope raved, cheeks getting a little red with indignation. “Yeah! i’dit!!” Jack echoed. Aaron enjoyed the newest phenomenon of Jack and Penny cuddling on the couch talking strategy while watching _Survivor_. If he let himself he could flex his profiler muscles and predict each member’s moves, but it was more fun to play along with their guessing game. Jack was slumped back against Penny, sitting in her lap. Aaron knew his boy was close to falling asleep with the way his eyes were slipping shut and he would sporadically shout out comments about the castaways, with Penelope firmly agreeing (and sometimes disagreeing just to get his goat). Every now and then Hotch would throw in his two cents, feeling happiness warm his chest when his comment would earn one of Penny’s wonderful chuckles.

When Hotch had offered that Penny stay with him and Jack until her den was comfortable, he thought he was doing her a favor. Now he wasn’t sure whether it wasn’t him who was really the lucky one. He found himself already mourning her leaving, even though her den wasn’t ready yet. Penny was a warm light in their home, and Jack loved her as much as she loved him. Hotch’s coworkers had been offering their homes as well, which made Hotch growl involuntarily. He was glad she was being accepted so readily by the BAU, and he was so happy seeing her face light up at the homey fixtures slowly transforming her apartment, so he would just suppress that twinge of gloominess that was gnawing at him. He didn’t want to think about what would happen when she left. Didn’t want to think about how she wouldn’t be sitting on the floor journaling while he worked on paperwork, how he and Jack would go back to just being the two of them, what questions Jack would ask about why Penny wasn’t over anymore. What hurt most was the lingering thought that once Penny left, their relationship would change into something colder, based on their boss-supervisor relationship, rather than the warmth that came from living together.

Of course, Hotch wasn’t going to tell Penelope any of this. He didn’t want to make his feelings her problem. He would just bury it and deal with it later. For now, he’d promised to take her to get everything she needed for her den, so he would. He could do this. He could be happy for her and shove aside the hole eating its way through his heart. His plan worked for a while. He, Penny, and Jack went furniture and decorations shopping on their free days. So far, she’d finished decorating and getting fixtures for her kitchen, bathroom, and now they were starting on her living room. She claimed that she would need approximately every pillow and blanket in IKEA, and Aaron couldn’t find the heart to deny the omega anything that would add to her comfort.

That’s how they ended up “cozy shopping” (Garcia’s words) this Saturday. It was half-past noon, Hotch’s backseat was already full of new, fluffy blankets, and this was their third store. Hotch’s head was aching, his eyes were sore from the buzzing florescent lights, and his hand had been doing the thing for the past ten minutes. He wanted nothing more than to go sit in his office with all the lights turned off, but Penny and Jack were having such a fun time picking out the best pillows. Aaron was already the kill-joy at work, he didn’t want to ruin his pack’s day too…not that Penny was pack. I mean, she could have been, if she wanted to be, but she didn’t…she was just living with the Hotchners until her apartment was comfortable. Hotch was getting antsier, every small thing adding up until the whole store was practically assaulting him. He was tired, and upset, and overwhelmed. He was about to burst when one small phrase cut through all the noise: “Brussels Sprouts?” he looked up sniffing for Jack (and Penny’s) scent, trying to find any sign of distress. Instead he found Penny and Jack watching him with a mixture of concern and comfort. _Oh…they were asking if he was alright. Was he?_ He thought about it for a moment.

On one hand, he was clearly running on fumes. On the other, he loved how much Penny and Jack were enjoying ‘cozy shopping.’ He didn’t know what to do. Hotch was getting even more anxious about trying to choose between the two…until he had a thought. Penny always had her noise cancelling headphones with her, and he was certain he’d seen a pair of sunglasses in her bag earlier. He’d look a bit silly, but if it meant they could stay and cozy shop, he figured it was worth it. Penny enthusiastically agreed to lend him her headphones (liberally decorated in her stickers from Christmas) and sunglasses, only giggling a little at her big-tough-alpha unit chief in the pink-on-pink accessories.

They spent a little longer finding the perfect combination of pillows ( each being thoroughly vetted by Jack for softness levels ), and even a rug that was the Perfect Texture, before calling it a day. They stopped by Penelope’s apartment to drop off the new fixtures before heading home. Aaron was too lost in his own tangled thoughts to pick up on Penelope’s own worries. Thankfully Jack was passed out in the backseat, worn out from the busy afternoon. Neither adult realized the other was worrying about the exact same thing. In a haze, they made their way inside. Hotch started on dinner and Penelope sat at the counter, rocking back and forth with Jack settled on her lap. They were both lost in their own worlds with nothing but Jack’s soft snores to fill the silence.

There was a moment of complete quiet, then suddenly both adults were looking at one another in silence. They shared soft smiles, each feeling an invisible weight lift off their shoulders slightly. Aaron went back to cooking and Penelope picked back up her rocking, softly telling Jack a story about a fox who only loved the moon when it was full and stole a star from a girl who loved it the rest of the time. Aaron listened along to the story, feeling some of the tension leave his shoulders. He hated uncertainty, and he hated not knowing what to do, but he could enjoy this moment right now. He didn’t know how to bring his feeling up to Penny yet, but he decided he wanted to figure it out. Jack stirred at the smells of dinner coming together, and Penny shifted to a new story about trees that grew sideways. The rest of the evening was much less tense. Aaron still fidgeted with his hand, but he was able to ignore his constant stream of worries in favor of listening to Jack’s excited babbling.

When Aaron collapsed into bed that night, the waves of worry started to crash back over him. He felt so insecure and exhausted. He never knew he could feel this soft around someone so quickly. He’d known the omega for hardly two months and his alpha instincts were already howling at the thought of her not being in his pack. Every time he even considered it, he felt an awful itch under his skin and a tension in his limbs. He had never had an issue like this before. While he was bonded to the BAU, he’d never felt the same aching in his bones at the thought of them being outside his pack. But Penelope? He couldn’t stand it. He couldn’t stand the thought that she would be out on her own without a pack–without _his_ pack. It just felt wrong thinking about his pack without Penelope. He’d never noticed the gaping hole until she came in filling it with her vibrancy and comfort. When she was around, something in him settled and he was worried about what that would mean for when she left. He eventually fell into an uneasy sleep, filled with vague and uncomfortable dreams.

On the other side of the house, Penny was laying awake, worrying about the coming future. She’d been putting off decorating her bedroom, starting with the less important rooms so she could technically claim it wasn’t comfy enough to move into yet. It wasn’t that Penny didn’t want her own space–she did. And she was loving how her apartment was looking, it was filled with color and texture and warm lights. She was happy….so why did she feel this awful gnawing in her gut and an itching in her limbs at the thought of leaving? Penny’s heart hurt at the thought that once she was gone Aaron and Jack would go back to their lives and forget about her. Or worse, they’d be relieved when she was gone and no longer intruding in their pack. That thought hurt Penny more than any other. As welcoming and wonderful as they had been, Penny knew this was a temporary situation with its deadline slowly looming over her head. She would just try her best to enjoy her time with the pack while she could.

If only they would both stop being stupid and talk to one another…eventually.

**Author's Note:**

> hope y'all enjoy! come say hi on tumblr @pinkesthoney !!


End file.
